How to Kick Ass When the Chips are Stacked Against You

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We’re going DEEP today…

If you want more success in life—whatever that may mean to you—but you just feel like the chips are stacked against you right now, then you’re definitely gonna wanna read this…

…Especially if you’re not one of “them”—the ones who seem to get everything right.

17EAD694-A874-4CF2-BEC5-557FD458BA12-w800-h600They make it all look so damn easy, don’t they?

It’s like somehow they’ve got it all figured out.

And more often than not, it seems like you don’t even have a clue. Well maybe you do, and if so, would you please let me know?—cuz I sure don’t.

They’re like super-humans or something. At least they appear to be.

They say just the right things at just the right times.

They solve problems with certainty, grace, and style.

They’re good at, like…well, fucking just about everything.

They’re in amazing shape, make great money, and hop out of bed each morning at 4:15am sharp with stunning hair, a winning smile, and that “can-do” swagger. By 4:20am they’re ready to take on the world with an undying confidence that shines through in everything they do.

You probably see their posts on Facebook…traveling the world, hanging with the “in-crowd,” shirtless on the beach. Damn, they look good.

Or maybe you see their ads in your newsfeed about how they can make you rich working just 4 hours a week, get you ripped by training just 3 minutes a day, and give you a life beyond your wildest dreams—just like the one they have.

They are fabulous.

Some are known as life coaches, success coaches, business gurus, fitness gurus, self-help gurus, or any other of about a dozen names. (A few years back I even tried to be one of these guys myself. It was pretty hilarious.)

They don’t have to be gurus, though…

36A38935-70D3-484B-BF8C-1991B61CB2C6-w800-h600They might even be that guy at the office who gets all the chicks….or that neighbor of yours with the perfect lawn, shiny new car, and beautiful family that hits church every Sunday at 9am…or they might be that business guy in line behind you at Starbucks that you can just tell turns everything he touches into gold. He sure sounds important on that call he’s on—VERY important. He takes no prisoners—nada one.

It sure would be nice to have what they have—whatever that is.

They’re living the dream. (Or so it seems.)

I am not one of these people.

If you aren’t either, don’t worry about it. The life of perfection is a boring one and only comes in vanilla.

Now sure, sometimes I feel like I’m living the dream life. But I gotta be honest with ya…there are times when it feels more like a nightmare…or at least one big pain in the ass.

I think that by writing these blog posts I’m unintentionally creating the illusion that I’m on top of my game, have my act together, and know some serious shit about life.

I don’t.

I’m no “life coach,” guru, or leader. I don’t have my finances together, my looks together, or my shit together. And I am truly amazed at just how little I know about life sometimes (well, all the time, actually).

writer2-w800-h600I’m really just a 6’6″ 340lb. obsessive-compulsive socially awkward introvert who likes to write about the things I’m going through, lessons I’m learning (or re-learning), habits I want to make stronger in my life, and areas I want to work on.

Writing is how I process things. It’s how I remind myself to live a certain way to the best of my ability. It’s how I let the poison out and keep it from spreading to my heart.

It’s my salvation. Putting it all out there for the world to see feels like an act of coming clean…a ritualistic washing of my sins…a chance to stand naked in front of the universe and look myself in the eye. And this is the best place to do it since I’m not very well hung for being such a big guy.

Now, if somehow my writing helps people process their own stuff, helps them remember what’s important in life, keeps ‘em a little more honest, or even just puts a smile on their face, all the better.

They say we teach that which we most need to learn. I have personally found this to be true—at least in my case.

Sure, sometimes I straight-up live the stuff that I talk about on this blog.

And fortunately, my obsessive-compulsive nature allows me to excel in certain areas. Mostly whatever it is that I’m obsessed with. Over the years this has been everything from lifting weights, building businesses, personal development, internet marketing, blogging, and even trying to take in a 5000 calorie-a-day diet of nothing but Vicodin—I used to take over 100 of those adorable little things a day. That’s one diet I was able to stick with for years. (Sorry, liver!)

But while in some areas of my life I’ve been able to dial in like a pro, there are other areas that I’ve let go to shit.

And even though sometimes I live the stuff I write about, there are other times I’m so far from living it it’s ridiculous.

I do things I’m not proud of.

Screen Shot 2013-12-10 at 4.54.09 PM-w800-h600I’m selfish—have been my whole life.

I remember in the 6th grade my football team won first place and we went to Round Table Pizza to celebrate. Everyone on the team got two slices of pizza. However, I noticed that there was one slice left in the pan, so I gulfed down my two pieces like a stray dog—not enjoying even one single bite—just so I could claim rights to that final piece and get 3 pieces of pizza instead of just two like everybody else.

Doesn’t matter what it is, I always seem to want more.

Not only am I selfish, but I eat too much—and trust me, 3 pieces no longer cuts it. Thankfully I also lift a ton of weights, which helps, but I still pack it on.

I was actually tested for worms as a teen because I ate more than the rest of the family all put together but was super skinny. The test came back negative and the weight finally caught up with me.

I have strange insecurities…

I don’t like to take my shirt off in public, like at pool parties and stuff, even when I’m ripped. I could have a 6-pack, but unless we’re having sex, the shirt stays on.

tall-w800-h600I always like to be the biggest guy in the room. In fact, I don’t like to be around anyone who’s bigger and taller than I am unless it’s one of my buddies—like Big Mike, Big Scott, Big Larry, or Big Will.

Fortunately it’s pretty damn rare—there’s just not that many 7 foot tall 400lb guys running around out there.

I love to brag. I want people to know how awesome I think I am. I just don’t like to come across like I’m bragging, so I’ll sandwich my boasting and self-aggrandizement between self-deprecating humor so I seem more humble than I actually am.

And I do like to think that I’m humble. In fact, I like to think I’m the most humble person in the entire world—because when it comes to humility I’m just on a whole ‘nother level with that shit.

In my twenties I had real bad ingrown toe nails on both my big toes. Since I couldn’t afford to go to the doctor, I just pulled out the entire nails with a pair of needle-nose pliers.

But one of them never grew back right.

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Me and this dude have the exact same big toe on our left foot

So now the big toe on my left foot is so jacked up and fugly-looking I use it to scare kids on Halloween—even the big kids. It looks like Shrek’s big toe or something—if Shrek had an evil twin brother whose foot got run over by an angry lawnmower.

Also, I drink WAY too much caffeine—even though it makes me super tense, I just keep on drinking more. (Right now sounds like a great time for another cup, actually.)

I actually drink so much that my eyes start to flick around. It’s a little freaky looking.

I’m plagued with thoughts and feelings of not being good enough. And the rest of the time, I’m high on massive doses of false superiority. If I don’t feel that I’m better than you, I feel that I’m much worse than you. I know we’re all equal here, I just want you to know that I’m better than you. This is very important to me.

I’m hard on myself…always thinking I should be “this,” should be “that,” and that I should somehow, in some way, be something more than I am.

Maybe one day if I “should” on myself enough I can be like one of them—the ones with the 8% body fat, millions in the bank, and life by the balls…the ones who know what the fuck they’re doing and always look good doing it.

One of my life-long hobbies has been collecting shortcomings, bad habits, and even worse decisions.

And while it can be fun, it’s cost me a lot—mentally, emotionally, physically, and financially.

But it’s also made me a better human being. This part usually comes after kicking my own ass about 739 times.

At the moment I’m in a gnarly, excruciatingly painful custody battle that drains my time, money, and energy. It can be tough to practice love, patience, and tolerance when you’re fighting for that which you hold most dear.

If you’ve ever been in a custody battle, you know how deep the wounds can go. But if your heart’s in the right place, as the wounds heal, you become stronger, wiser, and more understanding.

I have issues with the IRS.

Relationship-wise I’ve burned more bridges than I have scraggly little hairs in my goatee.

F550F597-AF67-41E3-82D3-862F691C5D72-w800-h600I like to blame other people when things go wrong, but when I take a long hard honest look at each situation, I can see that I was almost always the arsonist, and that a huge portion of the problems I’ve had with other people were actually problems I had with myself—it’s just easier to point the finger at them. And it’s more fun—at least for a while.

It sure does suck when others get hurt by your actions.

Especially when you know there’s a good chance you’ll never be able to fix things. You do what you can, but sometimes it’s not enough, and somethings you can never fully amend no matter how hard you try.

I have a big mouth. I just don’t seem to have come equipped with one of those filter thingys most people have. It gets me in trouble—A LOT.

People tell me I wear my heart on my sleeve.

I have a strange sense of humor that only a handful of people get—but for some reason I feel inclined to bust it out on everyone, everywhere I go.

My mom is one of my biggest targets. Usually when I call her, I use a fake voice and try to fool her into believing I’m a debt collector from something she forgot to pay 20 years ago, a neighbor concerned about seeing a UFO hovering over her house the previous night, or possibly even the long-lost brother she never knew she had.

Because I’ve been doing this to her for nearly a quarter century, she’s on to me by now. But when I am able to fool her, the victory is sweet. Maybe one day she’ll get a cell phone and have caller ID. I pray that day never comes.

At least my mom is used to it by now, unlike some innocent dude at the drug store who just wants to pick up his condoms for an evening of fun and doesn’t wanna some stranger behind him in line to tell him to “put ‘em to good use, buddy!”

…or that “STDs are just a myth made up by the condom manufacturers so they can get your hard-earned dollars.”

…or that “I heard they just recalled that particular brand because they found tiny holes in them at the tip…you haven’t been using that brand lately…have you?”

Or whatever dumb shit pops into my head at the moment that is super funny to me, but oftentimes isn’t funny to those around me. I get a lot of blank stares.

In a way I’m a loner. I’m just a loner who knows a lot of people.

E25822AF-4E52-4197-8228-991E5C4E7E1A-w800-h600With the exception of my girl, my children, and a few close friends, I don’t like to be around people that much. Sometimes I do…short periods here and there, maybe an hour a day tops, but that’s about it. After that I need at least 23 hours to recuperate.

I tell myself it’s because I’m introverted. Which is true. But I also know it’s a control thing.

I’m the guy at the party who has no idea what to say to anyone.

And as for living in the moment, I suck at it. I’ve read the books, listened to the audios, I meditate, I do little things to remind myself to stay present, but after all this practice, I can confidently say I suck at it.

I just do my best to keep coming back to it.

It’s like I’m always in a hurry or something. A caffeine-fueled race to get to the next thing, to do something other than what I’m doing right now, to knock shit off my to-do list. I love knocking shit off my to-do list.

It’s like my operating mode is to get THIS thing done, so I can go do THAT thing. But when I get to THAT thing, it always turns into THIS thing.

And the truth is I’m not sure if I’ll ever actually find THAT.

bleed_type-w800-h600Writing is the closest thing I have found besides sex. But how much sex can you have before you end up in serious trouble—injured, emaciated, and severely dehydrated? (I could use the weight loss though.)

Writing is the thing that sets me free. It’s one of the few times I feel at absolute peace with myself and the world.

It’s my portal into the moment.

But not just writing anything…

It’s when I write the raw shit—the stuff that hurts as much as it helps…the stuff that burns my heart from the inside and just needs to get out—or else.

The other stuff I write—like the marketing stuff I do for my business—sure, I enjoy it and it’s probably my favorite way to make money that I’ve found to date…

… Unless CNBC is ever going to put out another season of “To Catch a Predator” and are looking for a replacement for Chris Hansen. THAT would probably be the coolest way to make money in the world—going around busting kiddie rapists. I could do that shit all day and I’m pretty sure I’d be great at that. I love when Chris comes walking in the room: “How ya doing?”

But I bet I could it better.

Damn I wanna do that.

But for now, writing the marketing stuff will do. While it doesn’t release me from the unrelenting pain of life like the stuff you’re reading right now does—the stuff I’m almost sure no one should ever see, but I just can’t seem to help myself from publishing—it does pay the bills.

Without writing I’d be probably be a homeless guy with crazy hair, purple pants, and a tin foil hat yelling at people on a street corner. (That life actually does carry a strange appeal for me, though. Must be the hat.)

Combined with training, writing delivers the ultimate one-two punch for dealing with all the shit life throws at me, and that I throw at myself. Mostly the shit I throw at myself.

It brings me into the ever-elusive present moment.

priest-w800-h600We all need something to help exorcise the demons.

And we all have our demons.

If your life feels hard…if it’s painful, exhausting, and more challenging than you want it to be…just know that you’re not alone. We’re all in this thing together.

We’re all going through our own stuff, and no matter how big or small whatever we’re going through is, it can seem like a big deal to us. Especially when we’re knee-deep in it.

But when we return to the moment, we realize that very little of it is a big deal at all.

Almost all of our struggles contain important lessons for us to learn. And until we learn our lessons, we’ll continue to face the same struggles over and over, like the abused woman who keeps getting involved with men who hit her.

And if you suck at staying in moment, don’t worry; like I said, I do too. Just keep coming back to it, though, cuz it’s always here.

Find things that help to open up the pressure valves—whether it’s praying, writing, meditating, training, passion projects, helping people, talking with a supportive friend or group of friends…whatever it is that brings you into the moment and takes away the need to control.

When we do this, we can walk through the fire without letting it burn the living shit out of our feet.

I probably should take the torch to that big toe of mine though.

The key is to find something that sucks you in so deep that your problems no longer exist—at least not for the moment. Just make sure it’s not heroin.

And if your life is a mess right now, don’t sweat it. Seriously, all of our lives are a mess. Things will get better, and then worse, and then better, and then worse. It’s just how it goes.

And what about the wealthy, the gurus, the success coaches, the beautiful ones, and the ones who make it all look so easy?

psycho-w800-h600Oh, their lives are a mess too.

I know my fair share of gurus, millionaires, and success coaches—and, truth be told, they’re some of the most fucked-up people you’ll ever meet in your life.

Seriously, I used to train Courtney Love when she was kicking a serious dope habit and she wasn’t half as screwed up as some of the so-called “gurus” I know.

Everyone’s life is absolute chaos.

And the more interesting your life is, the more chaotic things are gonna get.

But no matter how screwed up your life may be, chances are you have food in the fridge, a roof over your head, and there isn’t an army of badass motherfuckers on horses coming over the hill right now to kill all the men, rape all the women, and burn down the entire village. Not tonight at least.

Which means you’ve got it pretty good.

Even when life gets rough, there’s always a ton of stuff to be happy about. Plus, this whole life deal is gonna end at some point anyway, so might as well enjoy the ride while you’re on it. It’s ALL temporary.

And if you’re reading this blog, you get big kudos in my book. It means you’re probably interested in evolving as a person.

You are blessed.

The shit you’re going through is making you stronger and wiser. There is good to be found in it. And you always can use what you’re going through to help others.

Plus, you can completely turn around whatever it is you’re going through …IF you’re willing to do what needs to be done. And if you can’t turn the situation around, you can at least turn yourself around and look at it from a different angle.

One of my best friends, Big Larry Clay, is always saying “All works for good.”

It’s like the dude’s answer to fucking everything. Your house just burned down? All works for good.

Someone conned you outta all your money? All works for good.

Wife left ya? All works for good.

Larry had a youth that would have caused most people to either off themselves, become a lifelong victim, or turn into a lifelong perpetrator of the same kinda bad shit he went through.

As a young boy, Larry experienced extreme sexual abuse, torture, starvation, and homelessness. He also witnessed the suicide of a family member. And you know what? Larry is one of the most awesome guys you could meet and he wouldn’t trade those experiences for anything. It made him who he is today.

By all rights Larry should be a fucking serial killer.

But trolling the country looking for prostitutes to toss in his trunk isn’t the path Larry chose.

Instead, Larry took all that bad stuff that happened to him and turned it into something good.

Larry breaking shit.

Big Larry breaking shit.

Today,  6’8″ 330lb. Larry holds black belts in 8 kinds of martial arts.

He’s a high level Krav Maga expert and instructor who not only helps people get into shape with his gym and teaching them how to defend themselves, but he also does a ton of ministry work and gives one of the most motivational stories from the stage I’ve ever heard.

Like Larry, I wouldn’t trade all the pain and loss I’ve experienced for anything.

I wouldn’t trade it because of all I learned, how much it made me grow, and how it molded me into the person I am today…allowing me to share my experience, as well as what works for me and what doesn’t, with others right here on this very blog.

But I had to go through the most miserable, painful, and depressing places of my life to have the things I do today.

And I’m still going through stuff.

I just don’t let it get the best of me.

In my experience, the most interesting people, the ones who do the most incredible things, help the most people, have the most impact, and are the happiest…are the way they are because of the hell they once endured.

What we go through can kill us, or it can be our greatest gift. It can forge us into the person we want to become. The choice is ours.

AD931266-A8F2-4833-B712-CE6F4D7EC870-w800-h600Every day is a battle. It’s a battle with ourselves—our egos, selfishness, negative thoughts, and inner pussies.

We can either lay down and die or charge forward like a soldier.

And the charge begins now. It ALWAYS begins now.

Embrace the mystery of life, give up the illusion of control, accept yourself, be cool to your fellow man, love with everything in you—even when it hurts—and move forward.

Keep. Moving. Forward.

Talk soon,

Big Chris

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8E24D42F-02E9-4625-9726-0622E1A7AAE6-w800-h600

Written by Chris McCombs

Just put your primary email in here and I’ll be sure to hook you up ( I hate spam too so I promise to keep it private and never share it with anyone) … I’ll see you on the other side

Comments

  1. Pretty cool stuff, in-depth and seemingly realistic.

    • Chris McCombs Chris McCombs says:

      thanks Ben

    • You made my day today…..American Psych Business Card Scene?….That blog summed it up for me today. I’m 52 years old and JUST coming into the business. We have some parallels in our backgrounds. Lets just say that I’ve been OFF THE RADAR for a while due to some “circumstances that I didn’t realize that I didn’t have control of”…..Anyhooo, My sister IS a PMP like the guys in the video….From the outside looking in her world is perfect. Naturally I’ve caught a lot of static about deciding to go into this business, considering before my “disappearance ” I had a Wall Street career. The point is thank you for your blogs etc. They keep me going. I’ve been able to do so much today because of your words. Continue to keep it raw!!

  2. Yeah – I’ve heard this as “don’t judge your insides against other people’s outsides.” Thanks for connecting with me today! Moving forward….

  3. Chris! YES! I love, love, love reading your posts. I can consistently identify with so much of what is on your heart. Thanks for sharing, man! Bless you!

  4. Man, you have no idea how much I can relate to this:

    “With the exception of my girl, my children, and a few close friends, I don’t like to be around people that much. Sometimes I do…short periods here and there, maybe an hour a day tops, but that’s about it. After that I need at least 23 hours to recuperate.”

    It’s good to know that I’m not the only one :).

  5. Chris McCombs Chris McCombs says:

    right on Karim

    took me a long time to accept this fact about myself and not beat myself up for not wanting to go hang out with people all the time

  6. Nailed it!! Thanks for help setting my head straight.

  7. This is helping me a ton, all your blogs. I’m in a very deep rut myself, trying to deal with both family issues and college. Trying to start a club at and handling everything, plus taking a look at myself from the inside drains my energy. the latter especially helps confuse me, because it’s all changing very rapidly because of other issues. Reading these blogs seem to help piece everything together on the inside, filling in the puzzle pieces and slowly creating the masterpiece i need to see in order to make some life-changing decisions I’m trying to postpone ( though that’s making it even worse ) . These blogs are helping a great deal, keep ‘em coming!

    Thanks for supplying such enlightening ideas!

  8. Big Chris,
    I appreciate and really enjoy your blogs. Great stuff, you are truly a gifted writer in expressing what many people feel.
    Keep at it. I plan to hook up with you in 2014 for some coaching.
    Stay strong, Fred

  9. Hey Big Chris,

    That is one kick ass post!
    It is without doubt.. THE most honest and open post I’ve ever read online.. Period..

    You talk from the heart – and don’t hold back..

    Proud of you fella..

  10. Aloha Chris,

    I enjoy reading your posts.
    I like the way you let things out.
    Life sucks if that what you choose to be !!
    But, I’m learning to shift it!! It works!! You have to remind yourself every single minute that life is now !!! and it can be beautiful !! Don’t let struggles turned your life to BS!! Love, patience , gratitude and faith always everyone deserve it.

    Plenty aloha To you Chris!!

  11. Thank you mista, reading you is kind of like the expression riding on giant’s shoulders.

    I appreciate your contribution in my life ,)

  12. Great post. Thanks-I needed this today! Just know you made someone feel better. Pretty cool.

  13. Did you happen to reference Howard Stern up there? “…let the poison out…” If so, I love your writing even more than I already did. Great essay.

    • Chris McCombs Chris McCombs says:

      didn’t reference stern, but actually thought about him at one point while writing this

      thanks for the kind words Lindsey (=

  14. Chris you just nail it every time. I think I relate to your posts because they are so obviously true and honest. You really have a knack for expressing some heavy subjects in clear concise language. I have yet to read a post that didn’t speak directly to me. Keep it up.

  15. thank you. i haven’t read through the entire post yet but will bookmark it and read it many times i am sure. but i wanted to say thank you. thank you for writing this and all your writing.

  16. I think you need a hug, and a switch to decaf.
    But seriously. Your ADHD blogs really help me put my life into perspective. Thank for sharing!

  17. You’re articles continue to be an inspiration to take life head on and to not be a victim. Can’t thank you enough for all the great reads Big Chris.

  18. Great post. Reminds me of the saying “Calm seas never made good sailors.” Or something like that not sure if I quoted it correctly.
    One of the best changes I made in my life was deciding to finally do the things that I was putting off. Starting with working out which has helped me lose 10lbs so far, shooting for 200lbs from 240. Also second was finishing a novel which I am slowly closing in on. By the way I did take your recommendation of reading “The war of art” which was very inciteful.
    Thanks for the post always look forward to reading the stuff you post.

  19. Hey there, Chris! I’ve been following yor blogs for a while now, and this post tops them all! It’s so raw. Wow. It helped me to get a better perspective on the shit in my own life. Thanks. Keep up the great work!

  20. Thank you for your brutal honesty .. It takes a lot of guts

  21. Eric Chisholm says:

    You had my attention with the image from the movie Valhalla. Im in. Nice work, Mr. McCombs. I’ll have what you’re having.

  22. Nicholas Finch says:

    Hey chris,

    At first I was wondering where this blog was going. I learnt a lot about how you perceive life and to me, you do seem to have your shit together. I take inspiration in what you say, because it is the first time I have heard someone who I consider to be successful, explain how normal they are. It’s easy to think that successful people have it all together, and I appreciate your lengthy blog post to explain otherwise. Cheers Chris!

    Nick

  23. Hey Chris,

    Thanks! Great inspirational post! Really connected and shows me a way to be at peace amongst the seeming chaos life often brings. Bring it on! !

    Cheers Sir:)

  24. Not sure if you get many comment from the other side of the Atlantic over here in London but your post was the thing I have read this morning and it was just what I needed.
    Smile on,
    Dan

  25. Damn you just ninja looted my convo with my bro James Campbell :p. Kidding you perfectly said what a lot of people i’ve been speaking to lately say and you’ve helped them and myself in knowing what it is that’s getting us the way and really to draw inspiration from it.

    Thanks again brother i hope you’re well and kicking butt. Much love from the community!

    Adil

  26. I love ya man. YOU help me hold it all together.

  27. you’re so bad ass in the most real and loving way. your give is enormous. your blog helped me out of so much dark in my life in 2013. after my health issue which is almost 90 % healed you helped drag me out of my darkness. because i get fucking tired. tired of holding my shit together when i just want to fetal it for a day with chocolate covered almonds a box of kleenex and a sandy beach with my best friend. you remind me to stay authentic and it’s okay to not have the answers. but the answers always come. when i get out of my way. hoping your custody bullshit closes up soon. your line about 5000 calorie diet is what keeps you a head of the game. so much gratitude to you .best man, maureen

  28. Chris,

    Love this post. I always seem to compare myself with others who seem to have their shit together, until I get to know them and realise they are just as messed up in other areas of life. As you say, if you got a roof over you head and food on the table, it ain’t to bad.
    I believe everything in life happens, its going to happen anyway so deal with it and let it make you stronger and better.

    rob

  29. That’s some real stuff Chris. Been through a ton of that too and you are right it only crafts you into an incredible individual if you don’t let it turn you into a evil nut job! Wouldn’t change anything in my past just want the future to be even better. Great post keep em coming.

  30. kevin josh says:

    Hey chris…..you have no idea how much you’ve been a blessing to me man. I could easily relate to most experiences you’ve had…this blog keeps me going. Every fuckin day i read it i get strength to tackle shit….train hard n just b real. Thanx bro…

  31. Thank you for the raw message Chris. You can tell it comes from the heart when you read and feel every sentence hitting home and a voice echoes inside of you going: “you’re guilty of this too”.
    It hurts, but not necessarily in a bad way. It’s sort of like… DOMS, or growing pain if you will.
    Thank you.
    T

  32. Greatness!!!! I have to share this with somebody I know right now. It’s interesting. I share some of the same “weird insecurities” and I am an introvert in a sales position. It is such a contradiction. It’s almost like being an actor sometimes. Good way to start the day!! Keep Rockin’ on Big Chris!!

  33. Chris,

    You are one of the great ones sir. You are making a difference and giving others the courage to embrace their dark sides and use them for a higher purpose. There is so much power in our darkness if we process it completely. This blog was a great read. Cheers bro.

  34. Hey Chris,

    As it always is…another good post. The serious deal is you’ve gotten better over time unfortunately having to deal with the typical dramas and the “extra large” ones as well.

    Stay strong brother…

    Peace.

    E

  35. Damn Chris—You nailed it..I love that you are on the planet…keep it coming and best to you.
    Ps…so what about your toe…many people have ugly toes…maybe you could tattoo it? :)

  36. Chris,
    My simple words are going to fail me as I try to express how impactful reading this was. I have followed you for a good while now, always enjoying and reposting the inspiration you convey. But, this entry struck me to the core. The parallels were strong and real enough that I had to fight back the emotion.
    So, thank you. My most sincere and humble gratitude for your bravery in writing this. You made 1 guy feel less alone in this world.
    Regards,
    Chad

  37. William Littrell says:

    Chris I know just what you are saying. A lot of what you’ve experienced I have as well. 2009 was the year from hell. Now going into 2014 I see a small light at the end of the tunnel and I know it is not a train. Love reading your blogs. You da man in so many ways you don’t know it yourself. Keep up the great work you’re doing and don’t give up. Whenever it seems the worst you’re about to get something out of this world in return for the troubles. Hang in there and have a Merry Christmas and wonderful new year. Speaking of new years I made a new years resolution 8 years ago that is the only one I have ever kept. Wondering what it is?

    Keep scrolling.

    Keep scrolling!

    Never to make another one!

  38. I always feel like your in my head and writing my words. You have a special place in my heart Brother.!
    Thank you for what you do it always gives me a reality check. L&R Quake

  39. Damn man, you’re a version of me thats a foot taller. Thank you for sharing. Dont be afraid to speak from your heart!! Theres a lot of good in there

  40. Hey Chris
    I can totally relate. Love your posts. Keep it real mate.

  41. Thanks Brother,
    As usual when I read your posts, the right words at the right time.

  42. Chris,

    I’m a pastor. I’d trade 50 self-righteous jag-offs in my church, too proud to know themselves, for one of you. Love the honesty. You rock. Keep it up.

    Larry

  43. I think that about sums it up B.C.! thanks for fighting the fight and for keeping it real Bro. Don’t stop.

  44. Best blog ever, I Iaughed my ass off, and I needed both a good laugh and a smaller ass.

  45. You are a brave soul.

  46. awesome post
    really makes you stop and think x

  47. Thank you for writing this. I just got let go from my job this week after months of feeling on top of the world. I felt like Alice in Wonderland falling down the rabbit hole. Your blog helped me put things into perspective and it’s very much appreciated you sharing your trials and tribulations and thoughts on them. It IS really annoying when you see those people who put on this persona of absolute perfection. So thank you and keep doing what you’re doing, dude.

  48. Fucking Phenomenal Blog Post! You are Blessing others through your Burdens

  49. Hey Big C-I love this post. I also am going through an excruciating painful custody battle right now and she is doing it purely to hurt me. I’m lonely, depressed, have some bad habits I know that need to end, and have no energy for anything it seems in my life anymore. But man I have to get through this for my children. I’m probably not real good at anything in life anymore but I AM a damn good father and always have been. I’ve got to get through this somehow. And by writing this I hope it’s a small step in the right direction. Thanks my friend.

  50. They say the reason so many of us are insecure in this time of social media is because we judge our behind-the-scenes against everybody else’s highlight reel.

    I got real sick at the beginning of the year and had to plow through one of the hardest experiences of my life – a friend of mine sent me your ‘ways to be a badass’ post and your words really helped me keep shit in perspective at certain points during 2013. I’ve been following since my buddy sent me that first link, and thought you should know you really are doing something good out there. From one writer to another: thank you.

  51. This is the only blog I still like seeing in the inbox. This post’s timing was crazy, giving me a clear head on a terrible day. What’s that saying? Be kind to people, we don’t know what battle they are fighting inside…some shit like that?!

  52. Than you Big Chris to posting that.
    Iam just !ike a humble, I use it like a brake, when challenge not serious.
    Main Battle ahead.
    Keep Moving!

  53. Big Chris. The universe just smiled real big at you for posting this. Goddamnit you rock man. Thank you.

    Little Mike

  54. I know you said you wrote this for you but there is some of me in that post.

    Also, even though you say your finances being in a sling it has me curious to want to know how much you make a month. I cant imagine you making less than $100,000 a month with your writing skills. You have to be one of the top online copywriters out there currently.

    Lastly, I have an idea…why not just write a script, hire an agent to pitch it to reality shows. You can be like dog the bounty hunter of catching predators!!! Alternatively, maybe start off with a book as a lead in product to get on tv and position yourself as an expert. You know how to research & write a provocative title/book to get you noticed. I dont have to tell you much else. I am sure you know ron douglas because the internet marketing arena is so small. Maybe you can scoop up his pdf publicity secrets, or, look up tactics for free via google/library. Perhaps you already know this I dont know, but, you can do it I think if you wanted to.

    Let us know when you on tv on your blog :)

    P.S. If you can host me out california and mentor me in copywriting/internet marketing i’d appreciate it. Just email me and i’ll let you know what I have planned for a blue print and we can go from there.

  55. Once you said: ‘You are sexy as fuck and you know..’
    - just can’t stop reading the posts.

  56. Great Post! It never ceases to amaze me that you always time your blogs so that they reach all the right people when they need to read them the most. Your timing is incredible. I really wish I was honest with myself as you are in your writing. It is strange that people can lie to themselves when they know the truth.
    I usually just tend to forget the offending facts when it is convient to my daily activities. Thanks for setting a Brutal Standard of Honesty that will help everyone deal with their lives and the lies they need to face in their lives. Thanks for all that you do, The world needs more people like you!

  57. Seriously, im not sure how you do it but somehow you always make me feel like I can take on the world and win one victory at a time…powerful stduff, thank you:-)

  58. WOW – Just read many of the comments above. I am feeling the happiness you give people. This puts my Saturday into perspective. I am going to snowshoe to the top of a mountain right now- not kidding about this- look around and seriously thank myself – cause I am selfish like you! – for reading this today. Funny how things drop into your lap when you really need them! Keep writing- you know your shit! You are the shit and I like it! Thank you,
    Rhea

  59. Some times you have to let the chips fall where they may. Too much to do, not enough time. I pray I’m never perfect, so I never forget how phenionimal life is.

  60. fuck! I had a strong feeling I’m lookin’ at the mirror while reading this! striking similarity from “feeling being not good enough” to daily caffeine abuse… Besides, maybe, two things: I’m not so big and I rather LIKE to take my short off )))
    Great post from a person who isn’t afraid to be REAL and ALIVE. Respect!

  61. MOMO PANTS says:

    fucking masterpiece. your words remind us all we fit in.

    i don’t take my shirt off at pool parties either. i would but i don’t

    keep on big guy
    maureen

  62. Great Post. . .Even with the Language for us Christian Freaks. . .But its a Great post realistic and Dead set on Internal Truth. . .

  63. great article! Your’e not alone! We all suffer on some level.

  64. Son of a bitch that’s some great insight and writing. Up yours for writing so well.

  65. Love your down to earth style. You are easy to identify with. Keep it coming, Chris!

  66. Chris, how cool that you sent out a link to this post from December. Helped me a lot. Thanks, mate.

  67. David A Query says:

    There are no words brother… cept, “Boom!” *drops the mic…
    I feel tha real is all I’m sayin’…
    Thank you.

  68. scotty de graff says:

    Dude, what is cool is that you get back to everybody. Amazing read and as a fellow student of life’s lessons and creative minds, am inspired to keep up on my artwork and workouts. Right on.

  69. You mentioned your friend Larry…How did he do it? I can understand that kind of childhood to a T and even though I’ve managed to keep strong, keep going…I’m running out of steam. Maybe it’s the age or just that I’m out of room in the crap room in my heart. It wears at the very soul of you. I’m not even sure I have anything left anymore.

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